BROKEN RECORD

365 Days of Thanksliving — Day 252

Forgive the apology, but I’m gonna sound like a broken record today.

I am just totally wiped. "Exhausted" doesn’t begin to describe how my head and body feel. I know I’ve written about this before, and for some reason, this seems to be a regular Sunday occurrence.

While leading Sunday worship—preaching mostly—energizes me, in the long run, it saps my energy. I think any preacher will tell you the same. They (the experts) in seminary used to say that preaching a 40-minute sermon is akin to working an 8-hour day of heavy mental labor. To that, I can say: yup!

Anywho, the service didn’t cause my exhaustion today; I began the day completely wiped.

Last night we went to bed a smidge later than normal. After watching all the drum corps last night, I wasn’t just going to head off to bed before the scores and champions were announced. Well, the folks in Indy took a super-duper long time getting the show on the road. As my dear old dad, Ronald Bonnicksen, often says, “I have a dead grandmother who moves faster than that.” No disrespect—that’s just a “Ronaldism.”

10:30 hit and we were hitting the lights in the basement. I pottied the pups, brushed my snaggletooths, marched upstairs, crawled into bed… and then… yah!

I often pray myself to sleep most nights. Not that I’m trying to fall asleep while giving my petitions to the Lord and thanking Him for all the blessings He gives; but honestly, I find myself dozing off midway through. Then, at some point, I awaken, realize I didn’t finish praying, apologize to God, try to finish, and fall asleep again. This can happen a few times. That’s a normal night.

Last night? Last evening was abby-normal. I began beseeching the Lord, actually finished making my petitions, and yet I was, like, still totally energized. (What, am I a Valley Girl now? Hahaha). That’s different, I thought. I then prayed some more: “God, please grant me a good night's sleep. You know I gotta work in the morning.”

I should know better than to pray such a thing. Every time I do, I end up staring at dark walls all night because my brain won’t hit snooze. At some point, feeling stuffy and hot—140 lbs of Boxer dogs taking up half the bed doesn’t help; they’re natural heating blankets—I got up and checked the time. My phone read 1:20 am. I took a sip of water and crawled back into bed. All I heard in my head was blah, blah, blah, blah, blah… until once more I slithered out of bed. 3:35 the clock read. UGH. “Lord, help!?!?!”

From there, I don’t remember much. Apparently, it stormed with loud clashes of thunder. I didn’t hear a thing. Perhaps I passed out. If I did, it didn’t last long.

Up again, the phone read 5:20. “Oh, come on now.” I was tempted to just get up and stand in the shower. My fear, though, was that I would’ve fallen asleep standing up with the water running over my head. My head felt like it was weighted down with a 2-ton brick.

Do any of you know that feeling?

Whelp, an hour later the electric rooster was crowing, telling me it was time to get ready for church. While I was quiet, I tried to keep a sense of humor about me… especially when my wife told me, “Eh-hem, you going out of the house like that? Your fly is down.”

I replied, “Well then, I guess they’ll be getting a show.” (That was my snarky response, anyway).

Anywho… church was good, IMHO. But as soon as we got out, I headed home. I took a rinse, put on comfy clothes, and ever since, I’ve been vegging in the basement trying to rest. I may have gotten a nap in. If I did, it wasn’t long, as my boys flanked me on the couch. They both thought my pillow was equally theirs: 1/3 for me, 1/3 for Arlo, and 1/3 for Gus.

Now, I’m writing this broken record of a post to you, moaning about how tired I am… but amid my moaning is a thread of gratitude. God is giving me rest this afternoon; and if history is any pattern, tonight I’ll pass out and awake feeling totally refreshed. That's something to give thanks for, as well.

Anywho… what kind of broken records are you grateful for today? Drop a line below.